What have I finished?

There's nothing wrong with not having finished, with being "mid-process" on your way to completing something. There's even nothing wrong with not knowing what you are going to end up with in the end. of letting the process guide you to what you'll end up with. Trusting in the process and trusting in yourself are the key.

Here are a couple of examples around this idea.

Often, when I first visit a client, I have no idea how I will help them! But I have learned to trust in the process of the questions I ask and trust in myself that I do have the skills necessary to help. Things start unfolding as I get to know the client and how he or she thinks and her likes and dislikes. Ideas start to come, and not usually just from me. The best ideas often come from the client--I am often just a catalyst to help them see how they would like to proceed. We have a vague idea of what the end result is--a more organized home, better time management, etc. But it is through trial and error (and close examination of those success and challenges) that we arrive on what works. Each step is a completion of sorts, along the "mid-process" route.

In another metaphor, think about the college student. Many young adults start college without being sure of what kind of a degree they want. They just start by attending required courses, then trying on some they think they like and making decisions from there. No one thinks less of them because they don't have a degree yet--they are "mid-process." The degree comes at the end. The experience comes the whole time! And how many people do we know who actually completed college in only four years, without taking longer or changing their major? I know a few exist, but I don't think they are the majority. What students have "finished" all along the way are hundreds of assignments, and dozens of papers, books and classes. Let's not forget to enjoy that "completion chemistry" with all the "little" completions along the way. (Good to remember whether you are a college student or not!)

And even when we've "finished" getting a degree, we are never finished learning or deciding we can take a few more courses, whether a new "course" at a college or a new "course" in life.

Completion is in the eye of the beholder.

While I might have several "to do's" on my list each day, I try to remind myself that I accomplish much more than those items on a daily basis.

If you've been feeling like you never seem to finish anything, I suggest you redefine "finished."

My dishwasher is a perfect example.

I could look at cleaning my kitchen as one big "To Do." But if I am telling myself that it's not "finished" until it's perfectly clean and all the dishes are put away and the floors are mopped...then I know I will never truly be finished. (Chances are good someone will dirty a dish while I am mopping the floor, and there you have it, the cycle starts all over!)

But what if I break it down into much smaller steps, and pat myself on the back as I complete each one? Won't I get more of that "Completion Chemistry" going, feel encouraged and not overwhelmed?

So here are some examples of big "to do's" and smaller alternatives.

Instead of "I'm going to clean the whole kitchen" how about "I'll just empty the dishwasher." (Or even--"I'll just empty the top rack." On a tough day I'll break that down to "I'll use a clean glass out of the dishwasher instead of one in the cabinet and I'll call it starting to empty the dishwasher."

Instead of "I'm going to do the laundry," how about "I'll fold the tea towels and put them away."

Instead of "I need to mow the lawn," how about "I'm going to see if the lawn mower has gas in it."

Instead of "I'm going to sort and purge my whole wardrobe," how about "I'm going to sort and purge my sock drawer."

Instead of "I'm going to run in a marathon,"" how about "I think I'll see if I can walk to the end of the block."

I think you get the idea.

Granted, it will take you many of these little steps to get the larger task done, but it is those little steps that get you started. And for many of us, it is just starting those little steps that seem to get in our way.