The Prime Directive

An organizing colleague, Margaret Lukens, recently asked her Facebook Friends/Fans, "What is your theme word for 2013?" Hers in recent years have been "doubling," "fundamentals," "ease" and "focus."

I knew right away that mine would be a phrase rather than one word. I had just watched the 2009 movie "Star Trek" and was reminded of "The Prime Directive." (Friends and family, as well as some of my clients know that I am a bit of a Trekker.)

Captain James T. Kirk

(Geek alert for the next paragraph...)
The Prime Directive (also called General Order 1) is a law of the United Federation of Planets (I am paraphrasing, you can see the full text here). Basically, it means that Starfleet captains (and their crew) must not interfere with the development of civilizations on planets that do not yet have space travel technology or knowledge of other civilizations on other planets. The Prime Directive, on many occasions, has helped to guide a captain's actions.

My thought here is not so much about non-interference, but of simply having a "Prime Directive" in our own lives. Some may call it "priorities." I can see setting a prime directive for myself (and maybe several of them, uniquely crafted for different situations. I might call them sub-orders.) My overall Prime Directive for the year might be "All actions must not interfere with the accomplishment of goals set for the year." If an action seems to conflict with my prime directive, I must stop and take heed as any good Starfleet captain would, and carefully examine my actions and their consequences.

Captain Jonathan Archer

We are, after all, the captains of our own ship and in charge of our own destiny. Each of our actions, no matter how small, can have huge consequences. Before the Prime Directive was "law," a research crew accidentally left a book behind about "Gangsters and Mobs of the 1920s" on a developing planet. This made for one of the more amusing original Star Trek episodes. That planet's civilization took it as their "bible" and crafted their culture into the violent guns and revenge mania of 1920s mob society.

Captain Kathryn Janeway 

Some might call these "resolutions"
Some of my goals for the year are to reduce the "stuff" in my house, have my kitchen cleaner more often and write daily. So, having my Prime Directive as:

 "All my actions must not interfere with
accomplishment of my set goals for the year." 

My sub-orders might look like this:

1. Kitchen sub-order 1: By bed-time each day, the dishwasher must be either running a load or nearly empty, waiting to be filled (and no dirty dishes in the sink). All hand-washed items must be washed and in the drying rack. (Notice that I didn't say I must have my whole kitchen totally clean and sparkly! Just one little step to help with "keeping it up" without overwhelming me.)

2. Reducing stuff sub-order 1: Every day I will put at least one item in my "give-away" bag.

3. Reducing stuff sub-order 2: With every purchase I make (household, clothing, food), I will test to see if it fulfills my Prime Directive or runs against it.

4. Writing sub-order 1: An hour a day, that's all it takes! I might even add that an hour writing upon arising and an hour reading before bed shall be my new habit.

What's your Prime Directive this year? It's time to Make it so!

Captain Jean-Luc Picard

Organizing is like a bowl of oatmeal

This post is something akin to
"Life is like a box of chocolates."

Let me explain...

My husband eats a bowl of oatmeal almost every day. However, he rarely finishes it before he leaves for work and he finishes it on the way. That means the bowl sits in his car all day before he gets home and sets it in the sink.

You know what that bowl is like 10 hours later, right? The difference between dried oatmeal and superglue is minuscule at this point. That bowl has got to soak for hours in water before it can be cleaned (by hand). There's no point in putting it in the dishwasher, which seems to only multiply the superglue effect of dried oatmeal.

My point here around organizing is this: it's often much easier to get to (and complete) a project or task right away, rather than letting it "ripen."

Those bowls or any other dishes, when newly dirty, are often extremely easy to clean. A moment of swishing a bowl with water and a scrubber will clean them well enough to set in the dishwasher for a thorough cleaning and sterilizing.

However, if you let dishes sit to dry and harden, it not only takes time to let them soak, but then more water (a precious resource in in drought-prone California), more effort (elbow grease) and more time (scrubbing, soaking) to get an item clean. What might have taken seconds and very little water, is taking minutes and gallons of water and energy just because you didn't rinse an item right away.

Now, is this an essay about the rewards of doing your dishes right away? (Yes and no.) For some of my clients, creating a habit of cleaning the kitchen is something we work on together. But really, I'm looking at the bigger picture here.

What other tasks are you putting off that cost you more in time, effort, energy and possibly money (since time is money)?

I know I've got a couple of overdue library books racking up some fines. (Actual dollars there.)

If I let the laundry go too long, then I suddenly have several loads to wash, dry, fold and put away. (And in the same vein, if I let the laundry sit in the dryer too long, I then have a load of wrinkled clothes that will now cost me time (and electricity...$) to iron.

If I don't open my mail and put all the bills in the "bills to pay" folder, I might miss a bill, have to pay a late fee ($) and possibly harm my credit.

If you can nip anything in the bud, then you will keep it from overtaking you and putting you in "overwhelm." Often, "overwhelm" isn't because we have so many things coming at us (well, for some people it is), but it's because we've let so many things get away from us and they become wild and unruly like spoiled children. Kids don't come out of the birth canal spoiled. Parents that have neglected to set rules and boundaries create spoiled children. Omissions rather than an actual act of trying to spoil kids. A lot like our omissions of not getting to tasks.

(In truth, a child does come out of the womb spoiled. They have had everything they have ever needed fed to them through a tube or encased around them. Heck, they haven't even had to chew and swallow. And I do believe we should "spoil" them for quite awhile after they enter the world with all that they need: food, sleep, clean clothes and diapers and love and attention. At some point, though, gentle boundaries are taught and they begin to assimilate into a world with other beings. But I think I have digressed a tad...)

All I am saying is this...the next time you are about to procrastinate on a task, think down the line a little. How long will it take right now versus how long it will take tomorrow or next week? Is there a price to pay? The price you pay may be in dollars, time, effort, another person's hurt feelings, your reputation or your credit score!

What's it worth?

Oh, and those oatmeal bowls? I think I'll encourage DH to eat toast...

How a massage can help you get organized

Yes, I really do intend to prove to you that getting a massage can help you get and stay organized!

It's a simple premise, really. One that I often suggest to my clients: Schedule something in your home on a regular basis--like a party or tea with a friend--and you will find yourself "cleaning up" more on a regular basis, too! The threat, uh, I mean pleasure, of having someone over and in the house, is always wonderful motivation to clean.

This was proven to me once again, and with my own home. I've sort of relaxed my "maintenance," this summer shall I say, and had let my bedroom go a bit. Last year, after a minor neck injury, I had semi-regular massages by a wonderful massage therapist who came to my home. Now, professional organizers have a reputation to uphold, and I certainly wanted to continue the illusion that I keep my home perfectly neat at all times. She would set up her table in our bedroom, and yes, I found myself tidying up that room and our master bath before her visits. I really enjoyed having these rooms so nice and neat during this period.

However, since my neck has been feeling better, I hadn't had Kelly in for months! And it showed! Tasks in the bedroom were a tad behind--laundry, vacuuming, dusting, etc. All the things that my mind's eye had been blocking, came into focus as I looked at it with a fresh "eye" knowing someone was coming over and would be seeing it.

I tidied up and enjoyed the fruits of my labor--and a wonderful 1.5 hour massage.

That's how a massage can help you get organized!

I'm also sure there are other factors working here--namely, that when you indulge in self-care, you are a happier and healthier person who is better able to focus. And when better able to focus, organizing and tidying up are also much easier.

So, yes, while massage can be seen as an "expensive treat" (although well worth it), the idea that scheduling something once a month or maybe once a week that might motivate you to tidy up is a solid one and can be less expensive or even free.

Here are some other ideas and their approximate costs. They are sort of in descending order. You may want to try the last ones first and work your way up.

1. Hire a housekeeper once or twice a month to do just the floors and counters in the kitchen and bathrooms. Cost: $25-$100. (More if you have a really big kitchen or lots of bathrooms. Most housekeepers in this area charge about $25/hour.) The idea here is that you will motivate yourself to get all your stuff up off the floors and counters so the housekeeper doesn't waste her precious time (and your money) moving things off them or putting things away. You want her to do the stuff you don't want to. (Ok, this is the stuff I don't like to do--sweeping and mopping.) You get a nice clean "base" and if she's coming on a regular basis, you are motivated to do your part before she comes.

2. Plan a party once a month. Cost: $0-$??? Obviously, if you make this a potluck, you reduce your own costs, and if you serve Russian caviar and imported champagne, it will be pricier. But you'll get two things out of it: motivation to clean your house before guests arrive and a nice time with friends or family. (Even nicer if you have friends and family who will help you clean up after the party before they go home!)

3. Have just one or two friends over for something very simple like coffee or tea, a game night, or watching a movie. Cost: $0-$10. Simple things like this keep the kitchen from exploding into a mess. Serve a simple cake or cookies or make microwave popcorn. DVR a movie, watch a DVD you own or rent one. Close the doors on the rooms you haven't quite gotten to. If you have nosy friends, maybe post a sign on the door that says something like "Sammy the Snake's Room. Just ignore him, he likes to crawl on people but he doesn't usually bite.")

4. Invite one friend over to go for a walk. $0 (Unless you need to buy new walking shoes.) This one sounds like it wouldn't help, but really, it's a nice way to break yourself in if you haven't had friends over in the house in a while. You may only have to meet them at the front door (you only need to clean up what they can see from the front steps), or depending on your level of progress in the house, let them in a little farther each time. So, maybe just the front room has to be tidy, or if they might need to "use the facilities," tidy up only the rooms enroute to the facilities!

And if all of these seem out of your reach right now, then please, at least go out and get a massage at a spa. The whole part about being good to yourself, self-care and massage helping with focus still stands.

And in case you are ready right now for an in-home massage, and you live in the Sonoma County area, my massage therapist has recently "left her day job" as they say and is taking on new clients. Give her a call and you will thank yourself. (And maybe me!) I've always felt so wonderful after her work on me and she helped me keep working after a neck injury.

Kelly Nelson (based in Petaluma, CA)
Holistic Massage Therapist
707-235-7911
707-773-0127

'Ware oh 'wear has all my clutter gone? Oh 'Ware, oh 'wear can it be?
(Two easy steps to reducing dirty piles.)

No, those are not typos. (Or "typoes" if you are Dan Quayle.)

In one of my tip sheets entitled "Riding the Laundry Cycle," I make mention of purging your clothing in order to simply have less of it around to wash. It's a simple idea, really and I'm going to take it a step further to help you build the habit of doing the laundry on a routine schedule.

Certainly, if you have less laundry, you will have fewer clothes that must be washed--you will be forced to do laundry much sooner if you don't have 365 outfits and try to do 52 loads of laundry on New Year's Eve. But I can help you get to the washer much sooner.

What usually makes you start a load?

Underwear? Yep, that's most people's answer. And how many pairs (lets just count the "shorts" for men and "panties" for the ladies) do you own? If it's more than 8, you could be in trouble.

In college, I had the unfortunate luck to overhear another student say she owned 30 pairs, and therefore only had to to laundry once a month. I thought that was a grand idea. (Kind of OK for a college student, but it wasn't working for me 15 years later.)

Why not limit yourself to 7 or 8 pairs? Having eight lets you do laundry once a week while still wearing one pair. (Nice, especially if you use a laundromat.) A client kindly pointed out that you would need to have an equal number of light/white and dark pairs for this to work should you decide to do laundry more than once a week and presort (as I suggest) the lights from the darks. Or have 8 that are all light or all dark.

Yes, (talking mostly to the ladies here) you can still have some of those "special" (read "pretty but not so comfortable") sets, but you must promise not to wear them once your "everyday" stuff is dirty or you'll be back to where you started. With too many loads to wash in your one or two precious days off.

So, that's the "Wear." Now what about the "Ware" you ask?
Tell me now about another area of the house where stuff stacks up to be washed....

Yep, the kitchen. We're talking about dinnerWARE and silverWARE now. The same rule applies here.

Limit how many of these things you have in your kitchen and can use before you are forced to load up (or eek, wash by hand) the dishwasher and run it. One summer I worked in Yosemite and had a tiny little space to myself and no dishwasher. I took with me only 2 plates, 2 glasses and 2 sets of silverware. If company was coming, heck, they were told to bring their own. (Having more than 2 people in this "space" was hard enough anyway!) It was so easy to just get in the habit of cleaning my ware right after using it. And of course, putting it all away was a breeze, too!

Now, I'm not saying you must limit yourself to 2 items, but do think about limiting what you keep on hand what you might use at one meal, or maybe in one day if there are only one or two people in your household. You don't have to toss your other dishes or silverware, but put them away in an inconvenient place so you will only get them out when company is coming. But if you have 89 spoons and tend to use them all before you do the dishes, then you are surely in need of a sort and purge day.

So, just limit your Wares/Wears and you will be on the road to starting new habits that reduce the messy-dirty-giant-pile/stack-needs-to-be-washed clutter in your home.